


why didn't you stay a little longer?

by choijisu



Category: ITZY (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Tragedy, F/F, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Mentioned Choi Jisu | Lia, Mentioned Hwang Yeji, My First Work in This Fandom, Oop, Rewrite, Self-Pity, Shin Ryujin-Centric, anyway, idk how to tag, it's her wallowing in self pity aha, kind of, old work so it's a bit ehh on the writing, old works, this is just really sad im sorry, unless u count my twt aus lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:02:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25654087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/choijisu/pseuds/choijisu
Summary: Falling into the couch, she reached out for her phone from her back pocket where she hastily slid the lock open. Lips trembling and her vision blurred out by the faces she's seen throughout the day, she tapped on the 'contacts' icon and pressed call on the number she had been trying to reach.or ;in which Ryujin mourns over the death of JIsu.
Relationships: Choi Jisu | Lia/Shin Ryujin
Comments: 1
Kudos: 22





	why didn't you stay a little longer?

**Author's Note:**

> listen to love poem by iu while you read

Ryujin stumbled into the apartment she had once shared with someone she loved. No, wait- someone she still loved.

It was dark, late and she was drunk. She's been going at it for two years now. She had even began to shut people who took in her situation and refused to talk to them. She had shut out Hyunjin and Heejin too. Talking to them about her feelings meant it was real. Talking to them about her meant she had accepted it. And she never learned to accept it quite yet.

Falling into the couch, she reached out for her phone from her back pocket where she hastily slid the lock open. Lips trembling and her vision blurred out by the faces she's seen throughout the day, she tapped on the 'contacts' icon and pressed call on the number she had been trying to reach.

It went straight to voicemail.

It wasn't likely for Ryujin to cry. She's outgrown her dramatics back in high school and stopped, and she can't exactly pinpoint how and why. But the moment she hears the familiar voice she's always dreamed about in her sleep, the voice of the person she still thinks she hears at night- everything just stops for her. It was more than crying, it was the kind of desolate sobbing that came from a person drained of all hope (yet, still keeps hoping).

Oh, how she wished for time to stop so she could go back.

"I know you're probably thinking up there, _"Holy shit, will she leave me alone?"_ and I really wish I would too. Yet, I'm still trying. I should just stop calling and reaching out because we both know there won't be anyone at the end of the line- I mean, it's Yeji who'll receive these because she has your phone," Her hands were shaking and her heart raced faster than normal. Instinctively, she opens her pack of Marlboro cigarettes and quickly lit one.

To avoid completely falling apart over and over and over again on the phone, she took a long drag and exhaled. "I'm sorry for that night. I really fucked it over, and I wish I didn't let you walk out that door," Her mouth filled with chemicals and chemicals that she wished would end her, Ryujin choked back on another sob. "I really fucked you up, god, I'm so sorry. I wasn't there when I should've been."

The burn of her tears stung her cheek as she let them fall all at once. Ryujin tried to hold them back, she really did. She just wished she could've held her back too.

"But you're gone, and there's absolutely nothing I can do about it. You could've been here with me right now, watching that dumb romantic comedy you loved so much.. You could've lived, Jisu. _Fuck._ If it weren't for that stupid driver and our stupid fight- none of this would've happened."

Pausing, she inhaled that grey stench, the odour that foretold of tar-infested lungs and her future death-bed. After a while, something clicked in her head and she immediately sobered up. Accepting that this would be the last message she would send, she mumbled a few more billion sorrys, words that she never got to say and ended the call with a broken goodbye. A text box popped up asking if she wanted to save or delete the message.

And as always, she'd save it.

* * *

On the outskirts of town, in a small apartment, a phone alert spoke up.

_You have one new voicemail._

Groggily, the girl reached out for her phone. She'd forgotten why the hell she left her brightness all the way up and cursed underneath her breath when she unlocked her phone. A familiar voice filled the room and the girl heard a shuffle of footsteps approaching.

"You can't hide forever, Lia,"

"I know."


End file.
